Chapter one: "Yes, godfather." (CRIMINAL'S PERSPECTIVE.)

Note: I really don't think this is the best opening chapter I can do, so need some good feedback, leave a comment/review please, and con we keep it constructive, I don't need "LOLOMGUSUK." comments, I need "You need to improve blahblahblah, but i liked blah." kina comments

The sun bled red over Newgrounds City, casting ominous shadows across the busy streets. Thimbles stood across the street from BigBadRon's little sidewalk café.

It was a small, innocent looking place with bright umbrellas protruding from the bushes that surrounded the little outdoor dining area, backing on to a small red-brick building with "BBR'S" emblazoned on the wall in neon lights.

He admired the place; it had a simple charm to it, which appealed to him.

Thimbles' thoughts returned to him as he snapped back to reality "Should I go in? It's not too late to turn back, you could go straight! Get a Job and start earning some money you didn't have to launder before using...nah, not gonna happen any time soon."

With that he crossed the street, and entered the building. There was a small bar and some tables inside, with brilliant white tablecloths draped over them at an angle, and assorted condiments on the table. On any other day he would've loved to sit down and have the balding bastard of an ex-cop wait on him hand and foot, but this evening was different...very different.

"Hey Ron! It's Thimbles!" he shouted, leaning over the bar and helping himself to a quick spray of "general" from the taps, a highly addictive, mind-rotting drink that had you hooked after one sip, or as Ron liked to call it, a "post".

No answer came. "Ron you bald fuck!"
"Geez, alright I'm coming!" came the reply.

The man appeared almost from nowhere, startling Thimbles.

"Jesus Ron ya scared the shit outta me there!"
"So? They're in the back room."

He motioned to the back of the restaurant, which looked a lot less inviting than the rest. A worn out, dusty old wooden door was nestled in a dark corner lit only by the single flickering bare light bulb swinging gently in the ambient breeze.

The sight of it filled Thimbles with dread, without warning his stomach started doing somersaults. "Suck it up man, you gotta do this...for the kids." He thought. Steeling himself, he walked toward the door, mumbling a thank you to Ron.

It creaked open before he could open it, revealing an almost pitch dark, cellar like room, with a row of tables from the main restaurant, without the cloths. Three men, older than himself were sitting at one of them, wearing double-breasted suits. Thimbles felt strangely underdressed in his blue and white pinstripe shirt and jeans.

"Take a seat." Said the man in the middle, a hint of malice in his voice.
Thimbles obeyed.

"Every man has a motivation to break the law, people don't just do it for the fun of it. What's yours?"

A bead of sweat rolled down Thimbles' forehead, his hand trembling under the table with nerves.

"Well, Cigolini, I do this for my kids, their mom died a few...a few years ago, and the welfare just isn't enough to cope."

"Hmm...so you need the money"

"Yes, godfather, and with this they'll be...they'll be set for life."

Silence reigned. The seconds seemed to pass by like hours as Cigolini considered him, staring intently at him, trying to break his nerve. Looking for a sign that he wasn't good enough.

He broke eye contact, and tried to stop shaking, but he couldn't, his foot started moving under the table, along with his hands. Dark patches had appeared under his armpits from sweat.

"God Hope I get this..." he said inside his head.

"Why isn't he talking?"

More silence. One of the other men whispered in the Don's ear, which seemed to make him lose concentration, he addresses the henchman.
"You really think so Camboch0?"
Camboch0 nodded.

"You're in."

I'm going to start this thing now, but I have to go away for the weekend so I won't be able to respond to any feedback left on friday until sunday...which sucks because I love attention.
This story is told from two different perspectives, from the theifs' and the cops'.

But this is the prologue.
3 weeks later.

"BULLSHIT!" LOLZILLA slammed his fist down hard on the steel interview room table, making ghyfty jump slightly in his seat.

He paused, walking slowly around the table, eyeing the suspect up. Questions wandered through his mind, "why is he lying? what's he trying to cover up?"

He stopped his slow, deliberate circle directly behind ghyfty, placing his hands on the back of the seat and leaning over him.

Another pause.

"Listen to me. You're in serious trouble here man, this isn't some unpaid parking fine we're talking here. This is grand larceny...and multiple counts of murder. At least three of those people were police officers."

The terrified suspect was still staring straight ahead, fixated on the door. Beads of sweat rolled down his face. He was shaking so much the chair itself was moving, squeaking occasionally on the bare metal floor.

'Zilla leaned closer in on him. So close he could see the sweat on his face.

"So don't you ever...ever, try to fuck with me."

I guess it's pretty clear now that CR won't be getting back to me any time soon. And you guys have made it clear exactly what you want.

I'm doing it.

In other news I got made an admin on NGX (might wanna pay it a visit sometime) and found out I was a cop.

So newgrounds, your Monday question of the week is "D'ya like my new header and sig?"

I just looked at my inbox. It's been one month and five days since christmasraptor was last online. Some of you (mainly the cast) will know we were planning to co-author a userpage story. Unfortunately since he's not shown any signs of life for a whole month, I have to consider making it a solo effort. i don't want to do that, I never did, but taking into account the fact that it's been this long since he even contacted me...I have to consider it.

I can't decide for myself because of a conflict of interest (I like the guy and we said we'd do it together, but the audience is waiting and time waits for no man), so i turn to you, the people who'll actually be reading it.

Should I try and go it alone?

After a week or so, I'll count up the yes/no comments and make my decision based on the numbers.

Thank you.

EDIT: May 12th 2008.

God, the deadline came that soon...CR, you have two more days....where are you? Just friggin' contact me! Show some signs of life!

2 days. I appreciate any and all yes / no comments.

I <3 YOU ALL.

BWIPBWIPBWIPBEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
!!! BEE BOO BEE BOO!!!

Guys, sorry about the long wait for the opening chapter of the story, but there are reasons for it. As I understand it, christmasraptor is having some technical difficulties on his end, and hasn't got back to me yet with the draft for his first chapter (in case I have any major objections to it, and to give me time to plan mine).

So yeah, sorry about the long wait, I'll PM you all when he gets back to me.

-GS-

EDIT: April 26th.
Still waiting.......

EDIT: May 1st

Still waiting dammit.

Here's the cast list, if you're not on it you were either too late or you didn't specify clearly enough that you wanted a part.

LOLZILLA-
SCUD14-
FLASHMAN16-
Black-Ops-
Kenshi2-
Ghyfty-
Racoonmario-
Gamerdakota-
Dew-
Cigolini55-
Thimbles-
Rig-
Jesus-Owns-X-
Neonflame126-
Camobch0-
Brayofden-
Irishchrisman-
Kokojo
Oxymaniac-
Krbyfan1-
AngryWorm-
KuroiYasha-
Murad136-

The idea is that christmasraptor does a chapter on his page, from the criminals robbing (thing), and then I follow up on it on my from the point of view of the cops.

EDIT: There were some latecomers I felt obliged to let in, due to certain circumstances (AngryWorm was in the previous story and KuroiYasha....well I just like him. And Murad136)

Christmasraptor and I had an idea that we should write another userpage story, but as a collab from multiple viewpoints, like if you read about the vilains on his page, you'd read about the cops chasing them on mine.

That's what we're doing by the way. He writes about the guys robbing a high-value target, and me and my team of cops are chasing them.

Leave a comment to get a part in the story.

EDIT: DEW FOR NG PRESIDENT, CLICK MY SIG TO VOTE! DEW FOR PRESIDENT! DEW FOR PRESIDENT! DEW FOR PRESIDENT! DEW FOR PRESIDENT! DEW FOR PRESIDENT! DEW FOR PRESIDENT! DEW FOR PRESIDENT!

Three questions:

1: Have you heard of me?
2: Am I a good BBS poster?
3: If not, how do I improve?